Come along now..... on a journey .... of your perceived success ........... it all came your way....
I know it is 5 years later now, But...............
the aging alcoholic that lives just across the street ( STEW) only notified me just today and I thought I should let you know.... You have been accepted into the Club at last..... your a winner just like me and ' Stewy' now.
At least he isn't trying to ply you with Cocaine... like he was that young couple that lived upstairs briefly.... I guess it is unnecessary to say he was trying to get in her young britches.... and the whole Penis enlargement story..........
As he lives just across the street 'he' thought I should be the one to let you know and be first to Congratulate you, so he stumbled across the black top with the news.........
My dear girl, they are at long last digging that huge ditch in front of your house you rallied so hard for and all that effort on your part a mere 5 years ago... all that hard work and then tossed in the towel.... at the then seeming end of it... YOU made the difference.
Your the winner, they are out there digging it today! With a big yellow machine and in your HONOR...........
What is it you say? and........ you don't even want the recognition anymore? The Prize money? due to the stipulations and the time that has passed... and being instructed who to invite to the dinner party?
You say?
You say you don't like the idea of being told where to eat at and whom to invite to the table and the seating arrangements? Stew said you have to invite him as well and sit next to him........... just thought I should let you know.... he was behind it all........
Congratulations 5 years too late....... with stipulations to be met...............
But Darling........ You WANTED it so.............. then.......... remember?
Dear little Miss So and So,
This is to Notify you......... that the ditch you proposed is presently under construction in front of your big yellow house....
The breeder of misery and contempt......... 'the dream too late'..... (Stew) wandered across the street in a stupor just to let me know and asked me to notify you on your behalf........ of the shared winnings.
Dear little Miss.... So and So........
signed.
The Luckiest Man in the WORLD.
You should see my boat.
